Written by Nicola Richardson, Founder of The People Mentor. The People Mentor supports small businesses, managers, and leaders in navigating challenging conversations, building accountability, and leading with confidence through practical, straightforward guidance.
This article is for managers who want to build real determination in leadership, and for business owners who are trying to spot it, either in themselves or in someone they are thinking about promoting. It looks at what a determined leader actually does differently, how that differs from simply being tough or stubborn, and how to build the trait deliberately rather than waiting to feel confident enough to show it.
Key takeaways from The People Mentor
- A determined leader is not the same as a tough or stubborn one. The difference is what they are consistent about.
- Determination in leadership shows up in small, unglamorous moments, not big dramatic ones.
- The most common place determination disappears is in the conversations a manager quietly decides not to have.
- Doubt and determination are not opposites. You can feel unsure and still follow through.
- Determination is a practice you build through repetition, not a personality trait you either have or do not.
What Determination in Leadership Actually Looks Like
I have worked with a lot of managers over the years who assume determination means being unshakeable. Thick skinned. Immune to doubt. Always certain.
That is not what I see in the determined leaders I actually work with. A determined leader is not someone who never wavers. They are someone who keeps doing the right thing even while they are wavering. The determination is not in how they feel. It is in what they do next, regardless of how they feel.
This distinction matters because it changes what you are actually building. If you think determination means never feeling uncertain, you will spend your energy trying to suppress doubt, which is exhausting and rarely works. If you understand that determination means staying consistent despite doubt, you can build it as a practice rather than waiting for a feeling that may never fully arrive.
The Myth of the Unshakeable Leader
There is a version of leadership sold to us through films and business books where the determined leader strides into the room, delivers a firm decision, and never looks back. It makes for a good story. It is not how most genuinely effective leaders actually operate.
The determined leaders I work with worry. They second guess themselves. They lie awake before a difficult conversation, wondering if they are getting it right. What sets them apart is not the absence of that internal noise. It is that the noise does not stop them from doing what needs to be done.
This matters enormously for new managers, who often assume that feeling unsure means they are not cut out for leadership. They are not lacking determination. They are experiencing exactly what every determined leader experiences. The difference between them and someone who is not yet there is simply whether they act despite the doubt or let the doubt make the decision for them.
Where Determination Actually Shows Up Day to Day
Determination in leadership rarely announces itself. It shows up in small, repeated choices that are easy to miss from the outside.
The clearest example is standards. A determined leader sets an expectation and holds it, even when it would be easier, in the moment, to let it slide. Someone is consistently late. A piece of work is not quite good enough. A team member’s tone in meetings has started to grate. It is always tempting to let these things go, especially when you like the person and do not want to create tension. A determined leader notices the temptation and addresses the issue anyway, calmly and early, rather than quietly lowering the bar to avoid the discomfort.
The second place determination shows up is follow-through on conversations that have already started. Plenty of managers can start a difficult conversation. Far fewer follow it all the way through to a clear, agreed outcome, and then actually check whether that outcome happened. I have written before about how to have a difficult conversation with your boss, and the same principle applies downward: the conversation is only half the job. The determined leader is the one who circles back.
The third is consistency under pressure. It is easy to hold a standard when things are calm. It is much harder when the business is under strain, the team is stretched, and addressing an issue feels like one more thing you do not have time for. Determination is precisely what shows up in those moments, not the easy ones.
How to Tell the Difference Between Determined and Difficult
Determination and difficultness can look similar from a distance, both involve holding a position and not backing down easily, but they come from very different places and land very differently on a team.
| Trait | Determined leader | Difficult leader |
|---|---|---|
| What drives the behaviour | A genuine standard or outcome that matters | A need to be right or in control |
| How they respond to new information | Willing to adjust the approach, not the standard | Digs in regardless of what they hear |
| How the team experiences it | Respected, even when it is uncomfortable | Resented, and often worked around |
| What happens under pressure | Stays consistent and calm | Becomes rigid or defensive |
| How they handle being wrong | Adjusts course and says so | Doubles down to avoid admitting it |
The practical test is simple. A determined leader can explain why the standard matters and is genuinely open to being shown a better way to reach it. A difficult leader is mainly protecting their own position. If you are ever unsure which one you are being in a specific situation, that question alone, am I holding this because it genuinely matters, or because I do not want to be seen backing down, is usually enough to tell you.
Building This as a Skill, Not Waiting to Feel It
The most useful thing I can tell a manager who wants more determination in leadership is that it is not something you wait to feel ready for. It is something you build through repetition, the same way any other skill develops.
Start small. Pick one standard you have been quietly letting slide and hold it, once, this week. Notice how it feels. It will probably feel uncomfortable the first few times. That discomfort is not a sign you are doing it wrong. It is simply what building a new habit feels like before it becomes familiar.
This is exactly the kind of skill the Manager’s Academy is built around: not abstract leadership theory, but practical, repeated practice at the specific moments where determination either shows up or quietly does not. If avoiding a hard conversation is part of what is holding you back here, why avoiding difficult conversations is so damaging to your team is worth reading alongside this.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is determination something you are born with, or can it be learned? It can absolutely be learned. Most of the determined leaders I work with built the trait through deliberate practice, not natural temperament. It gets easier with repetition, like any other skill.
How do I know if I am being determined or just stubborn? Ask whether you are genuinely open to a better way of reaching the same outcome. A determined leader adjusts the method while holding the standard. A stubborn one refuses to move on either.
What if holding a standard damages my relationship with the team? In practice, the opposite tends to happen over time. Teams generally respect a leader who is consistent, even when it is uncomfortable, far more than one who lets standards slide to avoid short-term tension.
Can you be a determined leader without being naturally confident? Yes, and most people are. Confidence and determination are not the same thing. You can act with determination while still feeling uncertain underneath it.
A Final Thought
Determination in leadership is not a personality you either have or do not. It is a pattern of small, consistent choices, holding a standard, following through on a conversation, staying steady under pressure, repeated often enough that they start to define how you lead.
If you want practical, ongoing support building exactly this kind of consistency, The Manager’s Academy gives new and developing managers the coaching and structure to build real determination, not just talk about it.